I still suffer from social anxiety at times. There’s my hot confession for the day! It’s nowhere near as bad as it used to be but, I think, because I haven’t seen so many people over these crazy months, it has led me to be more anxious when I do. So, these weeks leading up to Christmas are feeling a bit daunting. Do you feel anxious or suffer from social anxiety?

Below are some things I do if I find myself in the middle of a very anxious moment (this is also really helpful if you’re with someone who might be feeling frightened, agitated or worried about having a panic attack too). The important thing is to feel safe and calm. 

My top 6 tips help: 

1. Breathe slowly and deeply

This may seem obvious, but how many of us start to breathe high up in the chest in a shallow way when we start to become anxious? So, count slowly to 5 as you breathe in filling the lungs completely, and then 5 as you breathe out. If this is too much, try starting with 3 counts. If it works, gradually breathe out for 1 or 2 counts longer than you breathe in. This will automatically help the body to relax a little.

2. Try to think of a safe and relaxing place

This could be a favourite place in nature, somewhere you’ve been on holiday, or a beautiful garden (mine is a beach on a Greek island and Louise Hay’s was a vase of yellow roses). It helps me every time, I’m not even quite sure why! 

3. Try using all 5 senses

Connecting with what you can see, touch, hear, smell and taste can bring you closer to the present moment and reduce the intensity of your anxiety. By saying out loud what you can see, hear etc really helps. By touching my sleeve or my skin when I’m really anxious, it brings me back to the now.

4. Sit with someone if you can or cuddle a cushion

Feeling someone nearby, or holding their hand or having a cuddle if it’s possible, can be calming when there is any anxiety. If you’re alone and have a dog or cat, try to stroke or even cuddle them for some physical reassurance. If that isn’t available to you either, I find cuddling a cushion is so soothing.

5. Reassure yourself that the anxiety will pass and that you will be okay

I also repeat different positive affirmations and they have helped me incredibly, especially recently with some bouts of vertigo I have been going through which have been extremely distressing – “I am safe”, “Things are always working out for me” and “I am feeling better and better” are my favourite go to affirmations.

6. Do something that helps you feel calmer

This could be going for a run, getting outside and having a walk in nature, listening and maybe dancing to music, writing in a journal, watching a favourite film or something funny on Youtube. Laughter is definitely the best medicine for so many situations and helps me get out of an anxious moment.

Let me know how you get on with the above suggestions of what to do when you feel anxious. Have you some other ideas that have helped you or someone else? If so, I’d love to hear from you. Drop me an email at; hello@lizdoyle.net.

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