Or do you every feel unworthy? Do you tell yourself that you’re just not worthy or not deserving?

Such a big, sticky, messy subject – our feelings around worthiness…

Let’s go through this, step by step.

Feeling worthy is a state of mind in which you believe that you are valuable and deserving of good things. It is a sense of self-acceptance and self-love. When you feel worthy, you are more likely to take care of yourself, set and achieve goals, and build healthy relationships.

Maybe that can explain why we can subconsciously block what we want – because deep down, we just don’t think we’re worthy of it.

There are many things that can contribute to feeling unworthy.

These can include and of course are not exclusive:

• Negative self-talk
• Trauma or abuse
• Low self-esteem
• Depression or anxiety

This is an ongoing journey and now again, it still hits me and I need to gently and with a lot of self-compassion, bring myself back to those feelings of innate worthiness. It’s not always easy!!

I remember the first time it dawned on me and where part of my story came from. Because it all starts with self-awareness, otherwise, how can we change?

I was walking the dog one day…. and I was questioning myself (again…) about why I didn’t feel deserving. I had been cogitating this and wondering why saying to myself Louise Hay’s fab affirmation “I deserve the best and accept it now” just didn’t feel true for me….. 

Obviously, what I do is to help women see that they are always good enough and deserve the best life has to give and I thought that if I don’t feel it how can I help them. But that’s another blog for another day 😂😂

Then I went back to my simple “I am worthy” and it hit me!!

Growing up as a child, every day at school and at mass each week, we would recite all these prayers and one line that would be repeated over and over again was “I am not worthy”. 

Well blow me down with a feather – no wonder I had never felt worthy…. I had been saying it to myself for frigging years, almost my whole life.

So my new walking mantra whenever I feel slightly doubtful about myself or any situation for that matter is, guess what – yes….

“I AM WORTHY”

Say it with me…

It covers everything – that I am good enough and that I am worthy just because I exist…..

If you are struggling with feeling unworthy, there are things you can do to improve your self-worth in addition to the above walking mantra “I am worthy”.

Try any or all of these:

• Challenge negative self-talk. When you catch yourself thinking negative things about yourself, challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if they are really true (most of them are definitely not). If not, try to replace them with more positive thoughts.
• Set realistic expectations. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to be perfect. Everyone makes mistakes, and that’s okay. Learn to accept yourself for who you are.
• Surround yourself with positive people. The people you spend time with have a big impact on your self-esteem. Make sure you are surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself. If this isn’t always possible then try to limit your time with them!
• Take care of yourself. Make sure you are eating healthy, getting enough sleep, and moving your body regularly. Taking care of your physical health will help you feel better about yourself and your self-worth..
• Forgive yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. If you’ve done something wrong, forgive yourself and try to move on. Holding on to guilt and shame will only make you feel worse.
• Focus on your strengths. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. Make a list of your strengths and focus on developing them. When you focus on your strengths, you’ll feel more confident and worthy.
• Do things that make you happy. When you do things that make you happy, you’ll feel better about yourself. Make time for activities that you enjoy, such as spending time with the people you love, pursuing hobbies, or giving back to your local community.
• Seek professional help. If you’re struggling to feel worthy on your own, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. A therapist or a coach can help you identify the root of your low self-worth so that you can let them go and develop new beliefs about yourself.

The most important thing to remember is that it takes time and and some effort to build a strong sense of self-worth. But it’s SO worth it (pardon the pun 🤪). When you feel worthy, you’ll live a happier, healthier, and more fulfilling life but it can take small steps to get there.

Here is a link to one of my previous blogs with some very wise words from Brené Brown“

You were born worthy of love and belonging

And if you want to go in even deeper, here’s a super short video on worthiness I shared a while ago:

Remember, you are worthy simply because you exist. You are worthy of love, respect, and happiness. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, and that includes you!

If you’d like to find out how you can work with me to develop that deep sense of self-worth, why not book in a call with me so we can see if this healing work is for you? Here’s the link